Sunday 6 October 2019

Funny Comedy


1. Just because I say "feel at home" you now warm soup , make eba and chop two meat . Are you okay
2. In private school you pay, in private hospital you pay, but you want to eat private part for free . May private thunder
locate you...
3 . I still don't understand what *Talent* means ... Because the uglier you are, the more sweet your voice is.. Don't argue with me .... Just go to church and see..
4. Nigeria is not save, i was kidnapped and killed but I managed to escape
...
5. Who else noticed that No bank sent Happy Independence Day to their customers?
Nigeria
This is my country where a slay queen will celebrate birthday three

or four times in a year
This is my country where guys greet fellow guys with insults and girls greet by hugging each other
This is my country where education is the key but after graduation the girls become make up artists or bakers and guys go carry Keke or do Yahoo
This is my country where our politicians remember the poor masses once in 4 years
This is my country where once a guy carries laptop and police see you, you be Yahoo boy
This is my country where if want to get followers on social media you must do a give away
This is my country where a jobless girl will be complaining that most guys are broke abeg make you no insult me
This is my country where we have professional beggars on the streets and online...
May God help us for this country ....
6. So one day I will stand at the alter and then a lot of people will be watching me putting a ring on someone's finger ? Me that don't have sense , I will laugh and run away .
7. Just because I gave goat a lift and you're calling me a thief ...won't humans help animals again..
8. Research has shown that: every delicious
AKARA is sold near a gutter ..the bigger the Gutter...the nicer the AKARA..
9. So since all these years , nobody, not even my close friends actually told me that
the past tense of bread is Sliced bread
.
You people are wicked jare..
10. If your wife can't cook no problem cook
for yourself you are in a marriage not in a restaurant
If your husband doesn't give you money no problem you are in a marriage not a bank…work and earn yours…
(50-50)..
11. Last night i had a serious fight with my wife just because i was drunk , and she made me promised her never to get my self drunk again which I did. Today I went to my friends birthday party my colleague at my working place, we all ate , drink and had fun . And now am so drunk , I manage to know my way back home . When I entered my house I was sitting on my sofa in my sitting room when my wife was coming down from the step, and I don't won't her to know that am drunk so that we won't have another fight , I started operating my laptop
, when she came closer to me she said "honey who are you trying to fool? I can see that you are really drunk !" I quickly replied "look here woman I don't want your trouble this time around, because i won't tolerate
any nonsense from you. Well as u can see
, I'm only trying to do some office work on my system ." She said to me "I see, but why are you typing on your briefcase ??...
12. My neighbor called me to come and help her kill a rat in her house . I kept my condom in my pocket because no one knows the type of rat ...
13. Buhari is flying , Osinbajo is coordinating, saraki is wondering , Dino is joking , kanu is threatening , Bello is enjoying , Buildings are collapsing , prices are Rising , people are suffering , APC is disappointing , PDP is complaining , Teacher are crying , politicians are lying , Girls are slaying , Boys are Betting , JAMB is misbehaving️ , Graduates are browsing️ , Policemen are collecting
, EFCC are seizing , DSS is arresting️ , ASUU️ is striking ️ , Eagles are playing and
# Opeyemi is rhyming and you are reading very soon you'll start commenting️ , ISN'T NIGERIA INTERESTING??
14. A man with AK 47 ran into a church and pointed the gun at the congregation
saying️, "Who is a child of GOD here?! Let me send him to heaven? The congregation remained silent .
He then released one shot into the roof, the congregation shouted , "It's the Pastor ! He always says that he is a child of GOD!"
Pastor replied, "What kind of conspiracy is this? Every one here knows that I am the son of Ekua Safoa Donkor . How am I related to GOD?
15. My girlfriend ended our relationship today
just because of used condom a rat brought
into my room..
# FACT ..... Poverty is manufactured in bed. You can't be sleeping like you're competing with the dead and expect to be rich in the land of living ...
Get up and work
God help those who help them self..

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